Redneck Hot Tubs

Hot Tub – Redneck Style!

Ever get one of those “I am so brilliant, this will be killer awesome” light bulb type ideas, only to have your good sense filter come along and mercifully shoot that idea down in flames? Well, here are a few prime examples of what happens when the “good sense filter” breaks and rednecks just have to relax.

1. Soaking Party

Judging by the beer cans in the peripheral of this picture, it’s a safe bet that this wasn’t a sober decision … and I’m guessing there is no temperature control knob for adjusted comfort.recneck hot tub party

 

2. Magic Motorboat

Heating the water in your redneck hot tub is one thing but creating soothing bubbles is a whole other science. While this artist is brilliantly using the horsepower from his motorboat to stir up some bubbles, the roaring engine probably fails in providing a calming effect.

3. The Garbage Group

This home made hot tub is clearly reliant on body heat to warm the water – pile as many bodies in a confined space as possible and feel the temperature rise very very very slowly.

Redneck Hot Tub Garbage Group

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4. The El Camino

The first of many cars-turned-tub, this El Camino lined with garbage bags is an instant classic – wide enough for three and naturally heated by the sun, you can’t beat that.

Redneck Hot Tub El Camino

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5. Southern Comfort

I’m not a genius but if I had to guess, I’d say that this home made hot tub was invented somewhere in the south – based on the type of trees in the background that is.

Redneck Hot Tub Southern Comfort

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6. Group Therapy

When it comes time for improving your relationship with your father, look into this intimate variation of the homemade hot tub – not a lot of room to spare but surely a wonderful bonding experience.

7. Boiling Pot

Reminiscent of some sort of child-eating witch from Hansel and Gretel, this bucket-seated hot tub pod seems like a cozy way to spend a redneck minute.

Redneck Hot Tub Boiling Pot

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8. The Memorial Day

This one is pretty self-explanatory but the real joy is in listening to the proud inventor walk you through his creation – Happy Memorial Day!

9. Lawn Chair Lounge

Using a slight variation of the vehicular hot tub, these proud fellers are soaking with class in their refined lawn chairs rather than bothering with other more “trashy” methods.

Redneck Hot Tub Lawn Chair Lounge

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10. Hobo Hot Tub

“Let’s see, I’ll start a fire here, run a tube over there and bingo – we’ve got a home made hot tub. I recon I’ll even make a cardboard sign to show ‘er off to me neighbors.”

Redneck Hot Tub Hobo Hot Tub

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11. The Luau

If you’ve got an empty shell of a bath tub, it really only makes sense to prop it up on blocks and heat it over open flames – the only problem is not toppling over while getting in and out – might be a touch hotter than you bargained for.

Redneck Hot Tub Luau

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12. Scout Camp

Whether they’re certified boy scouts or Future Pyros of America, these born inventors are wise enough to know one thing; nothing heats water like an open flame.

13. Tin Can Fam Tub

Gather up the whole family and your farm feed trough and you’ve got yourself a regular five-star hot-springs resort. There’s absolutely no better way to connect with nature.

Redneck Hot Tub Tin Can Fam Tub

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Public Hot Tubs vs Your Personal Hot Tub

That creepy dude with the mustache and tight shorts, the pack of sweaty teenagers, kids with loaded diapers, yes they all use public hot tubs!

Doesn’t that make you itch just by thinking about it? It isn’t any wonder that public hot tubs can harbor unwanted bacteria. Shouldn’t you consider a pristine personal hot tub in the privacy of your own yard? Personal hot tubs are actually very easy to sanitize and maintain, keeping them pristine and bacteria free for your enjoyment and relaxation any time you decide.

Dirty Hot Tubs

My Morning Hot Tub Soak

With the changing of the seasons comes an adjustment in my hot tub soaking schedule.

I am a hot tub nut. One of the only reasons I like the winter in Utah is because that is when I enjoy using my hot tub the most. Nothing is better than 20 degree weather and 104 degree hot tub (minus the wind). The cold crisp air mixed with the embracing heat of my hot tub water is the perfect way to end a long work day. But those days are gone for now. With the passing of the summer solstice comes the passing of my night soaking routine. Not to say if friends and family are over I won’t get in on a warm summer night, but it’s the mixture of the cool air and hot water that makes this experience the most enjoyable to me.

A little background on my aches and pains: To get into better shape, a number of the neighbors have agreed to start playing some pickup basketball on the neighborhood court. There is not one ounce of natural talent in the bunch of us. We are out of shape, slow, and visually offensive, but we do it anyway. None of us can shoot the ball well, but we are all professional hackers. So we just plan on pulled backs, a rolled ankles, and a couple of bruises, and that’s the first 5 minutes. After returning home, I planned on getting into the hot tub, but my wife and the DVR (Dexter, love that show) seduced me away.

Rolling out of bed this morning nearly killed me. My arches on my feet were non-existent, my left calf was screaming and my lower back was knotted up thanks to a good forearm shiver the night before. I didn’t want my hut tub, I needed it!

So I quietly headed out back to my hot tub (Bullfrog Spa 462). It was 6:15am, so the sun was just peaking over mountains. The air was crisp and cool and the neighborhood was still. I had forgotten the early morning soak, and how great it could be, shame on me. I worked my sore feet and legs with the powerful feet jets and targeted my back with all my JetPaks. I rotate in all my seats for about 5 minutes a massage. Then cut the jets and soaked in peace. The hot water felt so good, making me buoyant and relieving all of my aches. I just closed my eyes and listened to morning sounds. It was great. I am glad that the seasons change so that my hot tub experiences can also.

Clay

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Keep relaxing!