Keep Romance Alive: Tips for the Young at Heart
Young love is easy. You’re both excited about your future and each other. This initial spark can tend to fade a bit, but, settling into a comfortable, quiet routine with your partner as the years go by, doesn’t mean that romance has to die. In fact, quite the opposite is true, a committed long-term relationship is the ideal climate to foster intimacy. Check out these three tips on how to fan the flame within your relationship.
Author Madeleine L’Engle wrote, “Love isn’t how you feel, it’s what you do”. Your relationship requires more intentional maintenance than most other parts of life. Set aside regular time that is only devoted to your spouse. It could be making every Friday “date night,” or spending some quiet time on Sunday afternoon in the hot tub together. Whatever you choose, stick to it. Intimacy is facilitated by routine.
It may sound a little gooey, but it really helps to make sure that kids, friends, and coworkers are aware of your affection, too. The kids will learn that the value of a strong relationship. Your friends will know where you stand and appreciate your commitment. Plus, the public accountability will encourage you to put in the hard work necessary to maintain the relationship.
Within the time that you’ve set aside for each other, find new ways to reconnect. Accept that your partner will change, and embrace the new sides of him or her. Consider trying activities that will challenge you to grow together, like taking a cooking class, or joining a book club. Not only will you have more to talk about, but you’ll uncover new sides of each other. Try making a list of activities to try for a week. Whether you’re writing a love letter to your partner, or eating a picnic in the park, the change of pace will refresh the relationship. Add in a few silly items too, like having a food fight or watching a comedy together. You’ll be surprised by how much fun reconnecting can be.
Find Ways to Serve
Secretly spend a week or two doing everything exactly in the way that the other person prefers. This could be as simple as putting on the toilet paper roll in the way they like. These small changes will both surprise and delight your mate. Plus, you might realize that the problems weren’t so annoying as you thought. They might even start doing the same for you! You don’t want to change your spouse, but find things you can both work on to make the relationship more enjoyable.
Carving out time in a busy schedule to focus on your partner, finding new ways to connect and putting the other person first are easy ways to keep your romance alive.